Diary Entries In The Series And Film Compared to The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer

The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer, Twin Peaks, Laura Palmer

Warning: Contains descriptions of abuse, rape, and drug use.

This post is made in an effort to amass Laura's secret diary entries as seen in the original series, Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me, and The Return, and compare them with matching or similar passages in Jennifer Lynch's novel, The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer. Some entries are included for the sake of their existence even if the content does not appear elsewhere.

The first appearance of Laura's secret diary in the series occurs at the very end of episode 10 (The Man Behind Glass, 2.003) when Donna Hayward finds it by chance in Mr. Smith's apartment.

Episode 10

34. INSERT: SMITH'S DESK

Donna flips thru the book. It is filled with feminine handwriting. She flips forward to the first page and we read ...
... this is the diary of Laura Palmer ...




Episode 11

From the script:

Smith turns through the diary, selects a page. He begins.

SMITH
"But still I'm afraid to tell her of my fantasies and my
nightmares; sometimes she's good at understanding,
other times she just giggles, and I don't have the nerve to
ask why things like that are funny to her."

Donna reacts. She knows exactly to whom Laura is referring. Smith continues:

SMITH (CONTINUED)
"So I feel badly again and shut up about it for a long
time. I love Donna very much, but sometimes I worry
that she wouldn't be around me at all if she knew what
my insides were like. Black and dark, and soaked with
dreams of big, big men and different ways they might
hold me and take me into their control ..."

The passage matches an entry in The Secret Diary dated October 3, 1985 (p.30) word for word, except for the omission of the word 'because' before 'sometimes she's good at understanding'.

Episode 12

For episode twelve, I've copied my amended version of the script. It includes lines that were altered in the televised version along with lines that were deleted. The deleted lines often pertain to the diary and are included to pinpoint when some dialogue may have been removed from the televised episode.

Red = deleted

{} = changed or added in the televised episode

* = my added descriptions

() = unedited descriptions from the scripts.

When dialogue reads as "{I was about} I'm thirteen years old. Fourteen maybe. Me and Laura put on our tightest shortest skirts. Too tight, but Laura talks {talked} me into it. And we go {We were going} to the roadhouse to meet boys." We heard it in the episode as, "I was about thirteen years old. Fourteen maybe. Me and Laura put on our tightest shortest skirts. Too tight, but Laura talked me into it. We were going to the roadhouse to meet boys."

DONNA
Uhm ... "Dear Diary ..." (to Harold) This is from a long time ago. Is that okay? *He nods assent* All right. Uhm ... {I was about} I'm thirteen years old. Fourteen maybe. Me and Laura put on our tightest shortest skirts. Too tight, but Laura talks {talked} me into it. And we go {We were going} to the roadhouse to meet boys.

Donna pauses. Harold watches her intently, writes as he listens. The room is suddenly very quiet and still. Almost eerie. As Donna gains the confidence to remember:

DONNA
Their names are Josh, Rick, and Tim. {They're} About twenty years old. And they're nice to us, {and they make us feel like we're older} they treat us like we're older. Rick asks if we want to party and Laura says yes. (beat) {And all of a sudden I feel this knot building up in my stomach.*We don't see Donna as she speaks.* But when Laura gets in the truck with Rick, I go anyway.} There's a stream in the woods. {Full moon, I think.} It{'s} seems pale and light out. The boys build a fire. I like Tim the best. He isn't so full of loud jokes like the others. (beat) Rick gets out a bottle of vodka and Laura starts drinking. I can't believe how much she drinks. She hands it to me. I take a sip. It feels good. (beat) Laura starts to dance around the boys. Moving her hips back and forth. Rick starts to clap. But Tim doesn't do anything. He just watches. Somehow that makes me {angry} mad. So I say, "Let's go skinny-dipping." (beat)

DONNA
(continued)
We take off our clothes. I know the boys are watching *cuts to close up of Harold, we hear Donna* us. The water feels really warm. The boy's legs are white and I can see them under the water. When Laura starts to kiss Josh and Rick, I don't know what to do. So I swim away. I think maybe I want to run but I don't. Tim swims over to me. {He kisses my hand and then me} I let him kiss me. And I let him touch me. Once. (beat) When we leave, and this is what I remember best, the boys are really nice. They don't make fun or talk down to us. And Tim ... Tim kisses my hand when we say goodbye. Then he kisses me. (beat) I can still feel that kiss. His lips are warm and sweet. My heart sort of jumps. *cut to Harold* He's talking to me but I {can't} don't really hear him. Just {Only} the kiss. (beat) *cut to Harold* I never saw him again. It was the first time I ever fell in love. But Laura ... *Her lips seem to move to form another word but the scene cuts to Harold's reaction.*

Donna exhales, a little overwhelmed. Tears shine in her dark eyes.


DONNA
That's all. (embarrassed; re tears) Sorry.


  • The diary entry detailing Donna and Laura's encounter with the older boys by the stream is dated October 20, 1985 (p.34). It spans over nine pages. Only correlating facts are noted.
  • Laura turned 12 (July 22) at the beginning of the book, and this event takes place in October of the next year, making Laura and Donna thirteen. Though, the diary seems to date matters a year ahead, setting the series in 1990. The age Donna gives, thirteen or fourteen, collaborates.
  • Laura wrote, "But we had on skirts that were pretty short and a little tighter than most people would approve of, except boys, of course."

    Donna said, "Me and Laura put on our tightest shortest skirts. Too tight, but Laura talked me into it."
  • The girls are at the Bookhouse instead of the Roadhouse in The Secret Diary. In the book, the girls went to the Bookhouse with the hope to to see the boys they'd met once before.
  • Donna said the boys were about twenty. In the diary, they're twenty-two.
  • The boys names are the same in the novel and series, Josh, Rick, and Tim.
  • Laura wrote, "Josh said he had some alcohol, and if there was a place we knew of to build a small fire or something out in the woods, we could all go out there and have a little party."

    Donna says, "Rick asks if we want to party and Laura says yes."
  • Laura: "They were in a truck this time instead of bikes, and so Donna and I get in the open back and told them to cross Lucky Highway 21 and into the woods behind Low Town"

    Donna: "But when Laura gets in the truck with Rick, I go anyway."
  • Donna said, "There's a stream in the woods. Full moon, I think. It{'s} seems pale and light out. The boys build a fire. Rick gets out a bottle of vodka and Laura starts drinking. I can't believe how much she drinks. She hands it to me. I take a sip. It feels good."

    Laura wrote, "We got to a place where there was a stream and hardly any needles on the ground, so the fire would be a safe idea. Tim and Rick looked for kindling while Josh opened up this bottle of . . . I guess it was gin that he had." Further on, "And was the first to drink a sip after Josh. We just passed it around . . . until it was empty. Donna and I were really messed up almost instantly."

Donna and Laura passing a bottle of alcohol around with three older men is reminiscent of the Party Land scene in the film Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me, where Donna and Laura drink with Jacques, Buck, and Tommy. 

  • Laura, "So I was dancing, and Josh and Rick couldn't stop watching me . . . and I was feeling pretty comfortable, or confident, or both, but I just went a little bit crazy and got into a sexier dance. One that I practiced alone in my room in front of the mirror. I moved my hips around in circles and let my arms move slow, and sometimes I touched my hips like it felt good to me to touch myself."

    Further on (of Donna), "I guess she wanted to be a part of the attention, too, or something because she looked at her watch and said, "Let's go skinny-dipping."

    Donna said, "Laura starts to dance around the boys. Moving her hips back and forth. Rick starts to clap. But Tim doesn't do anything. He just watches. Somehow that makes me mad. So I say, "Let's go skinny-dipping." We take off our clothes. I know the boys are watching us.
  • In the diary, the boys stare at Laura and Donna before asking the girls to join them in the stream, commenting on the way the shadows from the fire pass over their bodies. Tim stays with Donna, eventually leaving the stream with her to dress and talk by the fire. Laura writes, "when the boys dropped us off, we hopped out of the back, and Tim kissed Donna's hand really romantically..."

    Donna said, "And Tim ... Tim kisses my hand when we say goodbye. Then he kisses me."

The tale Donna weaves omits her withdrawal from the moment to which Laura was easily lost. Donna seems to portray herself in Laura's likeness, even swaying her hips when mentioning her friend's dance. She, in my opinion, attempts to channel Laura in an effort to seduce. Recall how Donna was jealous of the attention Laura received as she danced. Donna, at that moment, was in the shadows watching, silent and upset. Her efforts in the spotlight now, in an attempted seduction of a person devoted to Laura, is seemingly Donna in the role of her best friend. Perhaps Donna relived the moment in the water with those boys, wishing she would have been more like Laura. With Harold, lost in the past in the darkness and silence of his forest-like home, she is able to be her friend.

Episode 14

In a scripted scene that may have been deleted from the televised episode, Sheriff Truman reads a passage from Laura's diary.

TRUMAN
(reads)
"... he can come into my mind, a man who can slip in and out of you like a wind that goes unnoticed ... it just struck me that his name is a warning in itself; B-O-B: Beware of Bob."


This passage is a combination and alteration of two entries from Jennifer Lynch's novel. The first is from an entry dated, October 1st, 1986 (p.75)

P.S. It just struck me that BOB's name is a warning in itself . . .
B. BEWARE
0. OF
B. BOB


And in an entry dated, April 2nd, 1987 (p.86)

. . . I wish BOB would trade. If he does I'll try and find the person and tell them to beware OF THE MAN WHO CAN SLIP MAYBE IN AND OUT OF YOU LIKE A WIND THAT GOES UNNOTICED . . .

From the script,

Remnants of Laura's diary are spread out over the entire conference table. Cooper examines the remaining intact pages in the book, making notes, using a magnifying glass and what scraps he has in front of him to try and reconstruct the contents. He steps away from the table, picks up a cup of coffee and his microrecorder.

COOPER
(tired and intense)
Diane, it's 5:45 pm, I'm in the conference room with the remains of Laura Palmer's diary. A great deal of it has been destroyed, many of Laura's secrets along with it. Much of what I've been able to decipher supports the contention of the one-armed man; there are repeated references to "Bob". He was a threatening presence in her life from early adolescence. There are intimations of abuse, molestation. On a regular basis. He is referred to, on more than one occasion, as a friend of her father's. And I've just uncovered this entry, dated less than two weeks before her death. (reads from diary) "One of these days I'm going to tell the world about Ben Horne. I'm going to tell the world who Ben Horne really is."


The diary has a similar line in an entry dated, Oct 5, 1989 (P.175)

P.S. I'm going to have to tell the world about Benjamin.

The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer does contain repeated references to BOB and intimations of abuse and molestation on a regular basis. However, BOB is not once referred to as a friend of her father's.

Episode 15

In this episode, Cooper interrogates Ben Horne regarding Laura's diary. Ben swears ignorance. Cooper, however, continues, reading aloud from the diary.

COOPER
Some day I'm going to tell the world all about Ben Horne. I'm going to tell them who he really is. (Cooper closes diary.) She never got the chance, did she? (pause) Come on, Ben, we're all adults here ... Wild, young girl like Laura Palmer. Things spin out of control. She becomes a threat. Not just to you, but to your business ... your family.


Ben explodes, stands up shouting.

BEN
You are way out of line!

COOPER
Well, maybe you don't have anything to hide? (Looks through diary again) That's not what it says in here.


The novel has little to say about Ben Horne's disreputable past with Laura, other than his odd fixation with her, his buying her a pony, and devoting more attention to her than his own daughter at parties.

When Agent Cooper pages through Laura's diary for Ben's benefit, a partial entry can be read. This entry matches an early entry from The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer.

The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer, Laura Palmer, Twin Peaks

Words discerned:



From pages five and six of The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer,

paper. He just kept singing and I tried to tell him I wanted to go home and I wanted Jupiter to come with me, but I couldn't talk. Then he lifted his hands up in the air very, very high, like he was growing bigger and taller every minute, and as his hands went up, I felt the wind around me stop and everything went silent. I thought that he was letting me go because he could read my mind, at least it felt that way. And so when he stopped the wind with his hands like that, I thought he was letting me free, letting me go home. Then I had to look down because there was this heat between my legs, not nice warm, but hot. It burned me and so I had to spread my legs open so they would cool. So that they would stop burning, so so hot. And they started spreading by themselves like they were going to snap off of my body, and I thought, I'm going to die this way, and how will anyone understand that I tried to keep my legs closed, but they burned and I couldn't. And then the man looked at me and smiled this awful smile, and in Mom's voice he sang, "You'll come a'waltzing Matilda with me. . ." And I tried to talk again but I couldn't, and I tried to move but I couldn't do that either, and he said, "Laura, you are home." And I woke up. Sometimes when I'm dreaming I feel trapped there and so frightened. But now when I look at what I just wrote, it doesn't seem so scary. Maybe I'll write down all of my dreams from now on so that I won't have to be afraid of them.

Jupiter is the name of Laura's cat. He died when she was 13. This dream takes place before his death. In her dream, the bearded man said he had her cat, and she saw Jupiter run "behind him and off into the woods like a little white speck on a piece of black paper."


Episode 16

The following dialogue is from the script to episode 16 (2.009, Arbitrary Love). It is interspersed with dialogue deleted from the televised episode along with my notes.

DONNA
(reading with sadness, disbelief)
February 21st. [22nd] Last night I had the strangest dream. I was in a red room with a small man dressed in red and an old man, sitting in a chair.

Cooper reacts. He had the same dream. Laura, the midget, forgotten secrets whispered in his ear.


INTERCUT DREAM (CONTINUED)

DONNA
(CONTINUED)
I tried to talk to him. I wanted to tell him who Bob is because I thought he could help me. But my words came out slow and odd. It was so frustrating trying to talk. I got up and walked over to the old man. Like I was going to kiss him. *a noted silence.* Then I leaned over and whispered the secret in his ear. I told him everything. (beat) *extended silence* Somebody has to stop Bob. Bob's only afraid of one man. He told me once. A man named Mike. I wonder if this was Mike in my dream. Even if it was only a dream, I hope he heard me. No one in the real world would believe me. 

Donna completes the page, now turns to the other side. She reads

DONNA
February 22nd. (23rd) Tonight is the night that I die. (quiet gasp, a look at Cooper) I know {that} I have to because it{'s} is the only way to keep Bob away from me. The only way to tear him out from inside. I know he wants me. I can feel his fire. But if I die he can't hurt me anymore.
(Donna begins to weep) I'm not afraid. I'll miss Donna and James. I'll miss my home. But I'm tired and Bob won't let me rest. Death will be like sleeping. I'm almost happy. And best of all ... I'm free. 

The noticeable silence may indicate the removal of words.

Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me

Laura Palmer, The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer, Fire Walk With Me, Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me

As Laura searches through her diary, we can read a few of its entries.

The following is what I can perceive. The entry is incomplete.

Dear Diary,

Things haven't been so nice (?) here. We are all working late and everybody is very tired. Alot of people are catching colds + getting the flu. I hope I don't get sick while on vacation. That would be a drag. The woods in Seattle is rainy + cold and it's warmer out during the day but this evening it is clear and cold. If I catch a cold I'll be in deep trouble. If I don't work, I don't get paid, so I don't want to catch a cold. Thank you. We are all sitting here

The entry is remote to the film. It is not found in The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer or elsewhere. The phrasing of, "The woods in Seattle is rainy" reminds one of the poem performed by Harriet Hayward in the season two premiere (2.001, May The Giant Be With You), in which she recites, "The woods was our sadness." David Lynch is said to have written the poem.



This page is only partially legible. Words in parentheses are those guessed.

Dear Diary,

I spent the afternoon (with) Dr. Jacoby at his office. (He wanted) to see me (and go over) what I had (illegible) on my tapes. He (wanted) to hear more about (James) Hurley and the fact (
that) I had mentioned going (sober) because of him. I (told) him James was some(one) I had known for a (long) time, although not so (well) I told him I had (fallen) in love with his -

The rest of the page is a blur, but the passage is known. It is a match for the second to last entry in Laura's diary. The last page we can read as Laura searches through the diary is the final page of the same entry.


What I can read:

(illegible) (the last word is possibly 'from')
(ed) up all
pictures of me
envelope
to keep getting
(her) on coke
break down
I didn't
to hear my
they didn't
anyway
have
Love, Laura

The section from The Secret Diary,

 from my ad in Fleshworld home with me and stayed up all night putting pictures of me and my panties into envelopes . . . and how I had to keep getting higher and higher on coke so I wouldn't break down and cry and I didn't want anyone to hear my cries because they didn't matter to them anyway. They never have.

Love, Laura.


The entire entry in The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer. This entry will be mentioned again later in relation to the third season. 

The remnant page, one torn from the diary, has a few legible words. (Below)

Most words are guesses. They are as follows,

My heart
Sure if
It was
paranoia/paranoid
Deserved
to stay (?)
basically?
but bob/bob bob?
I love
Daniel
And
he/the

In The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer, Laura meets a little girl named Danielle after accidentally killing the girl's cat while driving. When Laura was 13, her cat passed away in the same manner. Laura sees herself in the little girl, even saying she looks and sounds like her. In one of the her final diary entries, Laura writes that she is afraid BOB might be visiting Danielle and that she wants to warn her of BOB. It's interesting that a missing entry may have featured the little girl.

The remnants of this page of Laura's diary oddly contain a few keywords from the second to last entry. It may be a coincidence but they're included nonetheless.

My heart
Sure if
It was
paranoia/paranoid
Deserved
to stay (?)
basically?
but bob/bob bob?
I love
Daniel
And
he/the


"I had been writing so much about him in my diary in poems and dreams and each time I did it I would see him at my window or feel him coming closer, but I wasn't sure if it was paranoia. . . . "

and,

"But I didn't deserve that. I deserved to stay here. I had done something wrong. My heart hurt so badly, but I knew I had to stay."


On page 156 of The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer, Laura asks BOB, "Who are you ... really?" Laura asks the BOB the same in Fire Walk With Me.
 


The Return


Pages supposedly from Laura's diary appear in parts six and seven of The Return

You can immediately see the difference in handwriting compared to the film and series. The pages themselves look different as well. Their yellow tint does not seem to be due to age.



The Middle Page



"There I was with a plastic pumpkin full of money and the clothes that Nancy brought ... She's (bending?) my ear with all sorts of non-sense. I can't make out what she's trying to say but I take it all in as best as I can.

I sure didn't need a mask today. Some Halloween!"


A similar entry from The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer, (P.177)

Dear Diary, October 31, 1989

It's Halloween. No mask necessary.
Blackie's sister, Nancy, from One-Eyed Jack's, brought MY clothes and the money they owed me stuffed into a plastic pumpkin. She asked if she could talk to me outside for a moment because

(PAGE RIPPED OUT AS FOUND)


Twin Peaks: The Return, The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer, Laura Palmer, Twin Peaks

The second page:

"The moon has been high in the sky for hours now.
I can't sleep.
IT'S 1:30 A.M.
I'm crying so hard.
I can hardly breath.
NOW I KNOW IT ISN'T BOB.
I KNOW WHO IT IS."


This entry is similar to the final entry in The Secret Diary. However, it is not the same.

From the novel,

"I know who he is. I know exactly who and what BOB is, and I have to tell everyone. I have to tell everyone and make them believe. Someone has torn pages out of my diary, pages that help me realize maybe . . . pages with my poems, pages of writing, private pages.
I'm so afraid of death.
I'm so afraid that no one will believe me until after I have taken the seat that I fear has been saved for me in the darkness. Please don't hate me. I never meant to see the small hill and fire. I never meant to see him or let him in. Please, Diary, help me explain to everyone that I did not want what I have become. I did not want to have certain memories and realizations of him. I only did what any of us can do in any situation. . . .
My very best."

P.S. I'm giving you to Harold for safe keeping. I hope I see you again. I can't stay sober anymore. I just can't. I have to be numb.

As an aside, it is frustrating that those in power made Laura misspell "breathe." They also had her spell 'a lot' as 'alot' in Fire Walk With Me. Her wording is simplified on screen as well in addition to the cloud-like circling of the description of her dream of Annie's message. If we were viewing the writings of a teenage Dale Cooper, I doubt he would be made to make similar entries. To draw and write as she does on this page denotes a carefree outlook unfitting for the time the entry was made.

When Sheriff Frank Truman reads from this page, a few words can be made out on its opposite side. I tried reversing, sharpening, and darkening the page. A few words stand out more than others. Searching through my PDF of Laura's diary for the words 'stay here' yielded page 181. Studying the page, more words surfaced, and slowly they showed signs of matching a portion of its text.



With the addition of my poorly traced words over those I can recognize. (Below)


In order to the same as write on the page, I had to use a computer other than my own. In doing so, I was unable to see the writing as well as it appeared on my own computer, no matter what adjustments were made. The image below contains words based on guesses rather than full sight. Apologies for its state.


The passage as it reads in The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer (p. 181),

I asked to be treated this way. It always happens, so it must be something I don't realize I say, or something I think. I told him how I went to my safety deposit box and how I saw the drug money there and I had a fantasy about taking it and running away forever. But I didn't deserve that. I deserved to stay here. I had done something wrong. My heart hurt so badly, but I knew I had to stay. I took the responses from my ad in Fleshworld home with me and stayed up all night putting pictures of me and my panties into envelopes . . . and how I had to keep getting higher and higher on coke so I wouldn't break down and cry and I didn't want anyone to hear my cries because they didn't matter to them anyway. They never have.

Love,  Laura.

Added August 30th, 2023: Twitter user Matthew Haywood has enhanced the diary page with remarkable clarity. You can read his post here. 

When Hawk first removes the pages from the stall door, the words, 'safety deposit box' can be read.



The ending of the entry is read on a more prominent page, the one detailing Laura's dream of Annie's message, though it too is altered from its original state in The Secret Diary.



"They've never listened to my cries and I didn't want them to anyway but there's this - this came to me in a dream last night ...
"My name is Annie. I've been with Dale and Laura (me??!!!). The good Dale is in the lodge
and he can't leave.
Write it in your diary!"
That's what she said to me. "


The original entry read, "I didn't want anyone to hear my cries because they didn't matter to them anyway. They never have."

When Frank Truman reads from the page, some handwriting can be seen on its opposite side. The back of this page seems to read,

"What does it mean I wonder?
What is it that Annie is trying to tell me exactly?
I keep going over it in my head trying to understand. Oh, Annie, what?"


A darkened and cropped image of the back of the page.

A page Hawk removes from the door to a bathroom stall.

It seems more than coincidence that the second to last entry from The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer should appear in both Fire Walk With Me and The Return. David Lynch must see the entry as one of significance. With its appearance The Return and FWWM, Dr. Jacoby's awareness of a great many things, including BOB, Laura's involvement with Flesh World, her sexual relationships with Leo and Jacques, Laura's guilt and strength gained from raping Harold, and her pain over being made Homecoming Queen, should, in my opinion, be seen as canon.

Other Possible Connections 

There are undoubtedly more connections than those listed here. The following is what I can recall.
  • The ending of the European Pilot sees BOB in his "killer's lair," the basement boiler room of the hospital. He tells Cooper he wanted to sing with Mike again. He then calls out Mike's name, asking if he can hear him, before he begins a song of rhymes.

    "Heads up/tails up/running to you scallywag/night falls/morning calls/catch you with my death bag."


    BOB's sing-song rhyming may have once been considered a common trait. On page 12 of the diary, Laura writes a poem about her memories of BOB. She includes the line, "
    Little rhymes and little songs."
  • On page five of the diary, Laura writes about a dream she had of a man singing in her mother's voice. Recall how, in the last episode of the original series, someone or something chose Sarah Palmer as a vessel to deliver a message to Major Briggs.

    An excerpt of the entry detailing Laura's dream was shown in the series. In the dream, Laura says the man she sees has long hair and "large, callused hands." She writes, "The tips of his thumbs were black like coal and he wiggled them around in circles as his hands got closer to me." She never mentions BOB's name in connection to the man, though it may be him. She describes him as having a beard, though BOB's facial hair in the series is akin to a five o'clock shadow. The description of his hands calls to mind the woodsmen of The Return.

    BOB's hands in the European Pilot are also covered with a dark substance.

  • In the script to the pilot, Sarah notices that Laura's bedroom window was open when she came into the room. The window is not open in the televised episode, through BOB crawls through Laura's widow in Fire Walk With Me and in The Secret Diary.
     
  • In the script to episode one (Traces to Nowhere, 1.001), Audrey shares with Cooper that her father bought Laura a pony.

    AUDREY

    My father bought it for me. (her ring) My father was crazy

    about Laura. He bought her a pony when she

    was nine, but he let her father say it was from

    him. Its name was Troy.


    What Audrey says corresponds with what is written in The Secret Diary, except in the diary, Laura was twelve when she received Troy for her birthday.
  • In episode two (Zen or the Skill to Catch a Killer, 1.002), Audrey tells Donna that Ben used to sing to Laura. In the diary, Laura wrote that Ben used to sit her on his lap and sing to her.
  • In episode three (Rest in Pain, 1.003), there is a very disturbing connection.

    ALBERT

    Traces of pumice in standing water outside the railroad

    car, suggesting soap. The kind used for heavy cleaning.

    Same pumice particles appear on the back of Laura's

    neck. Not her home-use brand. My conclusion: the killer

    washed his hands and leaned in for a kiss ... like this." 

    *Albert demonstrates cupping the back of her head with his hand.*


    In the diary, Laura explains how she'd like to be kissed, (p. 19)

    "I think he'd pull on my hair the way they do in my fantasies. With their whole hand, slowly making a fist at the back of my head, and pulling me close for a tongue kiss.
    "
  • The episode five script (Cooper's Dreams, 1.005) describes Laura's secret hiding place in her room as a ceiling panel. This is changed to a bedpost in the televised episode, which matches with the diary.
  • In the script for episode 8 (May the Giant Be With You, 2.001), Donna mentions a "Mr. Pendergast."

    DONNA

    So listen, I got hold of the list of Meals on Wheels clients that Laura used to visit. It used to be nine, now it's eight since old Mr. Pendergast died.


    In The Secret Diary, Laura is the person who finds Mr. Penderghast's (spelled with an H in the diary) body while making a Meals on Wheels delivery. (p. 173)

  • The scene with Buck and Tommy in the film reminds one in a way of Donna and Laura's time with Josh, Rick, and Tim. In the August 8th draft of the script, Buck has a second friend help him undress Laura, which is reminiscent of how Laura was with both Rick and Josh in the water.

  • In the film, Laura tells James, "Your Laura disappeared. It's just me now." In The Secret Diary, Laura often addressed the two halves of herself separately.  An example below,

  • Josie's past as a sex worker is revealed in The Secret Diary before being mentioned in the series. (p. 172)
  • In episode six (Realization Time, 1.006) Dr. Jacoby questions Bobby about the first time he and Laura made love, if he cried and Laura laughed. Bobby's affirmation leads to a confession that Laura made him sell drugs. This information is supported by The Secret Diary.
  • Nancy, Blackie O'Rielly's sister, the Tremonds, and Harold Smith are mentioned in the diary before their appearances in the second season. The diary was released before the airing of season two.

  •  Laura interacts with the grandmother and grandson known as Tremond and Chalfont in The Secret Diary and Fire Walk With Me.
  • In the script for Fire Walk With Me and the film, BOB speaks to Laura similarly to how he speaks to her in the diary. One scene is included in The Missing Pieces of BOB talking to Laura under the ceiling fan. Sarah appears at the end of the stairs and does not seem to notice BOB's voice, leading one to think he is speaking to Laura alone, possibly directly into her head.

  •  BOB's name is written in all capitals a few times in the August 8th, 1991 draft of the FWWM script, matching the way its written in the diary.  In The Secret History of Twin Peaks, Dr. Jacoby mentions that Laura wrote in her diary "of an entity she called "BOB," all caps."
  • In the diary, Laura visits an abandoned gas station after inexplicably receiving an address in her mind, 1400 River Road, where she finds the Log Lady waiting for her. An abandoned gas station plays a part in The Return. Margaret tells Laura, "Things are not what they seem." This is possibly an early version of the line that became "The owls are not what they seem." Laura also wrote, "She said that sometimes the woods are a place to learn about things, and to learn about yourself. Other times the woods are a place for other creatures to be, and it is not for us. She said that sometimes people go camping and learn things they shouldn't. Children are prey sometimes . . ." This could correspond with information in Mark Frost's The Secret History of Twin Peaks, where we discover Margaret was taken from the woods as a child. Alternately, it may possibly tie the story of how BOB first came to Leland and Laura.

  • Laura writes in the diary that Margaret's husband was a firefighter who died by falling face-first into the fire. She writes that Sarah told her Margaret didn't have the log until after her husband passed away. This corresponds with information in The Secret History of Twin Peaks.
  • BOB often enters the house through Laura's bedroom window in The Secret Diary. We see him do the same in Fire Walk With Me.

  • In Fire Walk With Me, Laura tells Harold that BOB must have found her diary. It was hidden too well. "There is no other person could have known where it was." This almost seems to imply BOB knew where to look because he could the same as read her mind.
  • The diary mentions large owls before the series mentions them. Large owls are also mentioned in The Secret History of Twin Peaks.
  • In the diary, Laura dreams of digging a well. She saw herself doing so to help the family with water, but when her mother went inside after checking on her, Laura tried to bury herself instead. p.51 The mention of a well calls to mind the woodsman's poem in The Return This is the water and this is the well. When James gave Laura her half of the heart necklace, they were standing by a wishing well.
  • In the diary, after Laura met with Leo and several unseen people in the woods, she is dropped off at her house. After going inside, she writes, "The daydream ended when I reached the top of the stairs and saw that my bedroom door was wide open - I stopped dead in my tracks. I looked toward my parents' bedroom. The door was closed tight. When I turned back to my room, what I saw was horrifying! I could clearly see a man's shoe behind my door, and then he emerged, smiling. It was BOB. With one hand he took my wrist, and the other he placed across his lips, "SHHHHH," with one quick pull, he brought me inside the room with him. The door slammed shut behind me." p. 105 This is reminiscent of Laura's encounter with BOB in her room, searching for her diary in FWWM. It may have been an inspiration for the scene in the film. 

  • The Star Pics Trading Card for Laura Palmer states the following, "For my twelfth birthday, I got a pony, who I named Troy. I took riding lessons every Saturday for two years. Everyone was so proud of me when I won a Blue Ribbon at the National Riding and Jumping Derby."

  • Carrie Page, a character portrayed by Sheryl Lee in The Return, has a horse statue in her home, and she wears a pendant depicting an upside down horseshoe. Though the white horse of Sarah's visions comes to mind, perhaps it is also a reference to Troy.

  • The Star Pics trading cards list Laura's favorite food as potato pancakes with creamed corn topping, matching The Secret Diary.

  • In a deleted scene included on The Gold Box, The Entire Mystery and From Z to A sets, Dr. Jacoby tells Agent Cooper that he was with Laura and Johnny the night before Laura died, during which time Laura read Johnny Sleeping Beauty. In The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer, Laura writes that Sleeping Beauty is Johnny's favorite book.

  • The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer gives a different account of Bobby killing a man than is shown in Fire Walk With Me. I see Fire Walk With Me as a film with its own stand alone canon. Though there are ways to ignore, incorporate, or work around continuity errors. It's difficult to imagine the Donna of the series being as aware of Laura's secret life as she is in the film.

  • In The Missing Pieces, Laura takes hold of the skin on the back of Bobby's neck and seems to pinch him. His face registers discomfort and he tries to move her hand. This is reminiscent of Laura's description of BOB's actions in the diary. 


  • In FWM, Laura encounters Margaret Lanterman outside the Roadhouse. Margaret's words and presence seem to calm Laura. She places her hand to her heart. In The Secret Diary, Laura also has a comforting encounter with Margaret at 1400 River Road.

  • In The Secret Diary, Laura writes about her attraction to Ronette Pulaski. In the film, Laura and Ronette seem close. In the script for Fire Walk With Me, Laura and Donna are said to "hug and almost kiss."
  • In the diary, Laura, in disdain, writes that Donna took her aside to announce she and Mike are planning on "going all the way." (p. 140) This is also similar to a scene in The Missing Pieces.

  • BOB
    I DON'T NEED ANYTHING.

    How nice for you. Now get out of my head!

    I WANT THINGS

    P. 127
Mr. C in The Return says, "Want, not NEED. I don't need anything, Ray" and "If there's one thing you should know about me, Ray, it's that I don't NEED anything."
 
O

In the end, The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer has too much merit to dismiss the work. It is dispiriting to read that some disregard the diary because it was not written by the series creators, because of its inconsistencies, or because of an unfounded belief that Lynch has not read it.

In David Bushman's Conversations with Mark Frost, Mr. Frost states that The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer 'moved' Lynch to make Fire Walk With Me. He also indicates that both he and Lynch are partially responsible for some content within the diary.

From Conversations with Mark Frost,

David Bushman

How involved were you and David in those books - The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer, The Autobiography of F.B.I Special Agent Dale Cooper, and Twin Peaks: An Access Guide to the Town?

Mark Frost
Lynch wasn't really involved in those, aside from The Secret Diary, which his daughter [Jennifer Lynch} wrote. She did a great job, and that moved him to make
Fire Walk With Me.

David Bushman
How did Jen Lynch come to be the author of that book?

Mark Frost

Lynch suggested her. He thought she'd be the right person to write it, and he was right. It was her first book. It was at times a struggle for her, as her first publishing gig, but in the end, she nailed it. I created an outline for Jennifer to use, and she really made that story come to life. People really responded to it.

David Bushman
What about the other books?


Mark Frost
I don't think he had any input into those. The Cooper book is a different form, the transcripts of his tapes. At times, it takes Cooper into more jokey character territory than we had originally conceived, but it still provides some solid backstory.


A fact that should be taken to heart is that David Lynch asked Jennifer to write The Secret Diary Of Laura Palmer. He entrusted it to his daughter.

The very fact that both Mark Frost and David Lynch wrote a forward for the 2011 edition of The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer should be some indication of its worth. Lynch must have had some faith in the work to have affixed his name to it. The novel was even released as an audio-book in 2017.

Jennifer Lynch said the following in #2 of The Blue Rose Magazine, 

I'm still not sure my father's read the entire [diary]. I know that he trusted me, that he looked at it, and I know that he felt that. I'd rather see that as not that he didn't want to read a book I wrote, but that he felt very confident with the choice he made in assigning the task to me, and it seemed to provide people with what he hoped it would."

Sheryl Lee has said many times over the years that, while filming Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me, she used The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer as a bible. She was constantly reading from it.

Laura's Ghost author Courtenay Stallings extensively covered the USC 2013 Twin Peaks Retrospective. Each event had different members of the cast and crew. Sheryl Lee and Jennifer Lynch attended the same show on May 5th, 2013. From Ms. Stallings' post.

"Alex Ago asked Lee if anything from the diary inspired her performance. Lee said she felt the character from the diary helped pull her through the performance. She said, “Sometimes it’s physical. Sometimes it’s intellectual. With Laura, it was raw emotion. Living with that – the shame, the secrets, the double life. It’s hard to talk about because I can still feel it. The rawness and the truth – the way Jen wrote that – it’s all there.”  Lynch responded, “Yeah, but look what you did with it.” "

In Scott Ryan's book Twin Peaks: Your Laura Disappeared Sheryl Lee the following:

"Oh, I mean, what an incredible gift it was to have Jennifer's work and insight. I read it then and used it as my anchor, my reference, as my internal guide, and I would go back to it and circle things and use phrases to sort of link into. [...]

The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer is not without its faults and its discrepancies with the series, but the series itself contains contradictions within its own canon. The diary deserves respect and its due recognition. Jennifer Lynch's work is not the same as fanfiction. It is Laura Palmer's story.

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